Wednesday, 17 October 2012

TO KEEP THAT RELATIONSHIP HEALTHY...YOU NEED TO DO THIS

As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another(Proverbs 27:17 KJV)Focus: I know many of you have heard or maybe even said, "Am I my brother's keeper"? If you did, I wonder what the circumstances were? 


I wonder if you had been dealing with a family member or a friend and you decided to give up? Maybe because of your placing amongst your siblings, you've had to take responsibility or carry certain loads with regard to family matters and you find yourself at the breaking point? 


Possibly you come to realise that you have lived your life trying to please and satisfy others and now you are exhausted, and you still haven't earned the love and respect of those in which you sought? Maybe you have found yourself in a situation where there is division and you need someone to help bridge the gap but instead they only widen the divide? I can honestly say that I have found myself faced with many of these examples. 


In my own experiences, I have always felt like an amateur boxer who is constantly knocked down but continues to get up refusing to be counted out or down. Many of these emotional blows have left me winded and fighting for breath. Mostly, they have left me trying to figure out what happened and why. A month or so ago I wrote about covenant/relationships and not wanting to throw people away. My greatest challenge in my personal relationships has always been what I perceive to be lies and deceit. When either or both of these become apparent, I tend to stray from whomever is involved. I decide that I no longer want to enter the ring with someone who will fight dirty....every round. I'm one who believes in talking when there is a problem. 


So, if someone has a problem with me, I believe they should talk to me. Some time ago, I was in a meeting with my boss and we were discussing personalities and leadership qualities. He said there was something he wanted to tell me but that he'd wait until another time. I thought if he didn't tell me then that he may not have the opportunity again. I told him that at the end of the day, he had an obligation to me to talk to me about whatever it was because it was his responsibility to encourage me even if that meant speaking truths that may be hard for me to handle. It is our responsibility to lovingly speak into the life of people whether they be co-workers, family, or friends. We owe the other person those constructive words spoken in love, that might cause them to look at themselves or a situation, in a different way. I told my boss that he was duty bound to point out his observations. 

I needed him to share his thoughts with me because I was struggling with some personality issues and I desperately needed to look at the situation differently, but because of my frustration and my just wanting the problem to go away, I wasn't able to be objective. We don't have to be rude or degrading, but we do need to be honest and forthright. We also need to consider the consequences of not telling the person, but telling someone else who always tells somebody else and it gets back. Iron rubbed together causes heat, and sometimes that heat makes us uncomfortable, but usually, we won't stay in a place where it is unbearably hot. 


Some might say that the iron on iron also causes friction, but the end result is a more polished and perfect piece of iron. Gold is not gold until it goes through the fire...repeatedly. The imperfections are burnt off then it is put back into the fire until all the impurities have been burned off. So rather than practise lies and deceit, we should help each other see something that we may be oblivious to. I have learned that sometimes people just won't go through the process for others or themselves and when that is the case, God will step in. When you've done all you can, be still and wait on God. Holy Ghost fire, burn in me!!!

Peace and Blessings,
Minister Yolanda Yolanda Awad-Hart
Lydia Ministries
Women Faithful and Favored

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